Give Us This Day.....(our daily blog)
Warning ! This page contains material that may include
adult language and violence, and will definitely offend
some people. Please read it with an open mind or don't
read it at all (seriously). Thanks ! -MA
I can always be contacted at info@MitchAmatrudo.com
WHO AM I ?? 911 ABUSE PAGE TOP 10 ROCK SONGS STUCK IN THE MUD
Miscellaneous Musings........
Since of course I have always been a "Mopar guy", I feel compelled to post this e-mail that was recently received from one of my old friends from High School. The guy always has really funny stuff to say, and he's an engineer so his banter is usually includes geeky but funny high-tech terms. Here goes...
Not to get all
the GM believers all worked-up, but I just got back from a trip
in which I had a displeasure of renting a Chevy Trailblazer. Basically
reaffirmed my thoughts on GM design/build quality. Seat belt restraints are
now integral to the seat, requiring a person to twist their torso to the left
and grab with right hand to get access to the seat belt (wtf?).
Backseat beer holders now require the use of two hands to operate? Two steps
backward here in the design department....
And don't forget the passenger door hinge squeak that's reminiscent of
a front door of a haunted mansion, and an interior roof panel had about
1" of vertical slop to it (nice oscillation when hauling over rough road!).
And slightly warped brake rotors. Oh yeah, the vehicle had all
of 6600 miles on the clock."
Sorry Bill but same
turd, different sheet metal….
Sorry,
A GM ex-patriot
AND THE REPLIES ROLL IN.......
"OK, let’s take this
point by point:
Seat belt restraint: Since there is only one time in a persons life when he must
wear a seat belt, that being his driving test, who cares if the thing can be
reached or not. Other than using the hook to open a beer bottle in a pinch the
thing has no use.
Backseat beer holder: Do I really have to explain this one? There are only two
places that beers belong in a vehicle. The one currently being consumed is
wedged between the driver’s seat and the center console and those on deck are
stored on the floor behind the passenger seat within easy reach.
Door hinge squeak: I hear that a team of scientists are currently working on a
new product line called ‘lubricants’. When applied to surfaces that interact the
theory is that these ‘lubricants’ will reduce friction and eliminate squeaking
noises. One can only hope.
Let’s take the last 2 together as I believe some understanding of the intended
use of this category of vehicle, a rental, needs to be considered.
Since a large number of the rental community view the experience as a chance to
see just how much abuse a vehicle can withstand without being returned on a
hook, 6,000 miles would seem to be about right for the minor problems you
noticed with brakes and headliner. The headliner issue could probably be
explained if you picture a carload of drunken idiots on a ski weekend trying to
see how high the driver can launch the vehicle off the next snow pile while the
backseat passengers grasp at the dome light and overhead storage for stability.
The warped rotors are most likely the result of that same crew repeatedly
stomping the brake pedal and yanking the emergency brake to see just how well
those anti-locks will perform on a frozen lake bed at 80 MPH.
I’m sure I could rent some Nip made pile and find just as many issues if not
more.
Supporting the big 3 = supporting your country and the troops. This is a time of
war, and as your president has said, you’re either with us or against us. What
are driving anyway, something made by Taliban Motors?"
I, Mitchell B. Amatrudo, of Manchester, CT hereby claim to be the biological
Father of the child of the late Anna Nicole Smith.
|
A couple of heroes in the news recently that are worth mentioning. Most of us know that the "H" word is one of the most abused words in the English language, since there is certainly no sports or music star that could ever be worthy of the title simply for doing what he or she is paid to do, regardless of how good they are at it, yet sadly we are still saturated with this word.
The first Mitch Amatrudo heroism award goes to James Kim, 35 of San Francisco who abandoned his family in the mountains near Portland, OR after being stranded for days. Many will say he did the wrong thing, and that he should have stayed with his family at the car. The sad truth is that as it turned out, this would have been the right thing to do since he died and they were rescued. It was fate or God or plain bad luck that killed this poor bastard though, nothing else. What would you do in the same situation? This guy watched as his family slowly began to starve and freeze to death. He could have waited it out and died with his family in an unpleasant but far more tolerable way than was his ultimate demise, but instead hiked a reported 16 miles in the snow and freezing cold to try to get help, where he eventually died of hypothermia. This guy is a true hero. Michael Jordan is not.
Award #2 goes to Wesley Autrey, 50 of Harlem, NY. The guy who saved another guy in the subway by jumping down onto the tracks with the victim and shielding him from certain death. This guy had to have known that there was a very good chance that he would not survive this stunt, yet he took action without hesitation to try to save a stranger's life, even while knowing that his 2 children would witness this horrific event. I'm very pleased to see that this guy seems to be getting not only the accolades that he deserves, but that folks are throwing money at him for his good deed as well. Good for them, too !! This guy is a true hero. Bono is not. |
Idiot of the week. I'm at my local "Stop and Be an Idiot" store. It's CHRISTMAS EVE, and it's 5pm, and of course every idiot there, including me, is panicked because we all forgot something that we needed for the Holiday. So the woman 2 customers in front of me is getting her large order checked out (apparently this moron not only forgot just a few small things, but forgot all of her Holiday shopping until now) As if this is not bad enough, she decides to pay for her order, which was in triple-digits, with Susan B. Anthony SILVER DOLLARS !! She's laying them out in piles of 5 at a time, and since there's about 23 piles already laid out and her baggie is now empty, I figure she's just about done so I decide to stay in the line instead of abandoning ship. Even the cashier is giving her a little bit of a hard time about the line being held up. But when it turns out that there are not enough coins to pay for the order, guess what ?... Out comes the checkbook. Smart enough to know that even a Christmas miracle could not make enough funds appear in this knucklehead's checking account to cover the remaining $6.34, I finally decide to bail out, of course muttering obscenities the entire time, and driving home from this cauldron of idiocy all pissed off on Christmas Eve !! |
I don't know of anyone but me that can have more trouble doing something as
simple as ordering digital cable TV. Even though I already have free
over-the-air HD capability and free "Tivo" service, there are some benefits of
digital cable that I know my family would enjoy so it became sort of a family
Christmas present. This story involves some technical terms and acronyms,
but you do not have to understand them in order to follow along with this story.
There is a 50 dollar "installation" charge for High Definition. The first
thing I did was tried to talk the guy on the phone into waiving this fee.
The reason, I explained to him, was that "I am one of those total techno gadget
guy geeks. My home theatre setup is VERY complicated, and trust me...the
guy you send over to do the installation is not going to have any idea what to
do, and I don't want to pay 50 dollars to have to watch over his shoulder and
explain it all to him". Well, of course I got nowhere with this, but the
guy did talk me into going with the DVR, since as a promotion there is no
installation fee with this deal. However, the DVR service is an additional
10 dollars a month. If I wasn't thinking about going with the DVR
initially I would have told him to stuff it, but since I kind of wanted it
anyhow I decided to go with this deal.
I go to my local Cox Cable office and pick up the box and stuff a few days
before I planned to install it so I can look everything over and see what else I
might need to make it work with my setup. The 1st thing I notice is that
this box does not have a DVI port on it to connect to my TV. It does
have an HDMI port, but my TV does not. I go to the Cox website to try to
figure something out, and I find several different box models that do have
the DVI port. Then I did some other online research and found a number
of different cable and adapters that would enable me to make the connection from
the HDMI port on the box to the DVI port on my TV. But will it actually
work, or should I just trade in this box for a box with the DVI port ?
Sounds like a question for tech support. It took me 3 phone calls and
about an hour to finally be told by the clods that answer the phone that...
1. No, we do not offer any box that has a DVI port
2. The cable that adapts the HDMI to the DVI will not work.
Look at the bold type above. I already know for a fact that they
do have DVI boxes. There are several of them on Cox's own site.
This of course makes me skeptical of their information about the cable not
working as well, so I nicely demand that they have a senior technician call
me back. Unbelievably I did get a call back later that day, and of
course the guy said that a cable or adapter will in fact work. I later
found out that this information is even right in the instruction manual for the
box, which of course was missing from the package when I got it.
This is a classic example not of poor customer service, but of customer dis-service.
if you don't know the answer to a question, fuck it...make something up.
Get the asshole off the phone so you can listen to the next hip-hop selection on
your ipod.
Next day. I start early because as I said my setup is very complicated and
everything is built in to a huge home theatre entertainment center. At
2:00 in the afternoon I finally have everything hooked up and put back into
place. The last step is to call the automated service to have the box
activated. This is a cool process. You call the number, and without
even talking to a real person (thank God for that) a number of signals are sent
to your home and the box turns on and off and does all sorts of weird things
which, for normal people results in a picture. Not me. Like Charlie
Brown, all I got was a blank screen with the channel numbers displayed at the
bottom. So, I call 'em on the phone and explain what's going on. The
first girl says that she will send a stronger signal to the box. It might
take 15 minutes or so but it will work. now keep in mind also that I
started drinking just before making the initial automated activation call in
anticipation of enjoying my new programming options. 15 minutes goes by
and still nothing. I call again. A different guy says "yea I think I
know what's wrong", and sends more signals. This idiot tells me "you can
still watch TV while you're waiting, but it may take 15 minutes before
everything in the box is activated. I'm about to hang up when of course I
realize..."wait a minute, what do you mean I can still watch TV while I'm
waiting ?" and he's like..."Oh, you mean you don't have a picture ?".
At this point I've already began to punch myself in the head. So, he says
he's gonna try yet another thing, and I'm to wait 15 minutes again. 20
minutes goes by and still nothing. I call again. This person is the
first one to realize that they are actually showing some kind of error message
with the box, which now I'm told must be defective. My choice is to have
them send someone out with another one (we all know how that will go) or for me
to go pick one up locally. I choose the latter, which means having to
drive, at 5:00, to their facility which is right in the midst of a bustling
shopping metropolis, and it is Christmas season. Oh boy.
So, I get home with the 2nd box. This time I disconnected all of my
custom connections, leaving only a simple in-out setup like normal people have
just in case something in my system is messing with these boxes or the signal.
I call for the activation again, and what do you know, it worked right away.
Still drinking, now I'm getting psyched that this mess is finally over, and I
have to admit that the picture is pretty nice. As I'm stepping up through
the channels, I find that all I have is the basic digital cable package.
I'm not receiving any of the extra stuff that I know I ordered. Now that I
know everything's working OK, I figure this will be simply yet another phone
call to Cox, the 7th of the day I think, and they'll simply blast another signal
to the box to upgrade it. Correct, only instead of getting the rest of the
channels I'm paying for, the whole deal gets knocked out entirely, leaving
nothing but a frozen menu screen and no more picture at all, much like your
favorite Windows PC. Now of course I'm drunker and even more pissed off.
I call 'em AGAIN, this time furious but still trying to be as nice as I can.
I get a young lady named Alyssa, whom unbelievably sounds like she might be
helpful, but still I have no choice but to slam her with the classic "CANCEL ALL
MY COX SERVICES, THIS USELESS DIGITAL THING, MAY CABLE, MY INTERNET...CANCEL IT
ALL !!". She did a good job of smoothing me over. When I
worked in Customer Service positions in the private sector I was the king.
I was the best. Period. To this day I've never found anyone better
than I was at solving people's problems and turning them around. It's
probably because of this that I get so much more frustrated than most people
when dealing with the idiots that are out there today. Anyhow...Alyssa
begs me to allow a tech to come out to the house the next day (between 3 and 5
of course) to try to see what's going on. I reluctantly agree, but she
says she will call me back the next evening, and that if the problem is not
solved she will gladly sever my ties with Cox.
The guy shows up the next day just after 3:00. I didn't get home until
4, but he waited for me which was cool. I'm telling him this whole story
and he's shaking his head since none of this is any surprise to him, and then
he's complaining because the dickheads on the phone get the customers all pissed
off, then the poor techs are the first real people that the customers see so
they take it out on those poor guys, which is exactly what I figured. He
says to me..."How long have you had cable internet ?" I tell him several
years, and he immediately says "Then you've got a filter on the splitter in the
basement. Should be no problem". He goes to the basement, removes
the filter, calls for another activation, and problem solved. Over 24
hours of all this bullshit, and the whole time all I needed was someone on the
other end of the phone to think for a minute about things, or put me in touch
with someone who can.
The tech put me in for a free month of Starz and Cinemax, probably because I
didn't scream at him like everyone else does, and Alyssa gave me 6 months of
free DVR service for all my troubles, but I still had to spend most of the next
day getting everything esle all hooked up again like it was before all of this
mess started.
|
Did you see the "American Music Awards" on TV recently ? Neither did I. That's because I decided I wanted to watch someone with talent, longevity, integrity, and charm, who actually has real musicians in his band, so I decided to tune in to the Tony Bennett special instead. I can't remember what the networks were, but I thought it was a great "Eff Ewe" from the network that ran Bennett to the one showing the award show, and to the entire "music" industry as well. I turned to the award show during Bennett's commercial breaks, and each time all I could was shake my head in disgust at the idiots up on that stage. God help us all. |
I swear, man...the weirdest things happen to me. I'm at the dreaded Supermarket the other day and this guy, an employee, pulls a "Mitch" on me. It's early, just after 8am. As usual I had a full day planned of stuff to do. I really wanted to get some shrimp for dinner, but you know how when you get there too early the seafood stuff isn't ready yet ? Well, in this case all of the seafood was already arranged nicely in place in the case over a fresh bed of crushed ice, and the kid was out in front putting the little plastic price tag signs on everything. I would never be one of those idiots who would ask the clerk to get me something before it was out, but I figured that this would be no big deal. So, I say to the guy really nicely something like "I know it's early and I'm sorry to bother you but can I get just a pound of shrimp please". The kid goes off on me, throwing down the handful of signs that he had and complaining to me "how am I supposed to get this done ?" Thinking of course that he was just messing with me, I provide the obligatory laugh. Then he looks up and screams "It's not funny, I'm trying to get this stuff done", finally going back behind the counter in a huff to get my shrimp. I was of course totally dumbfounded, pretty much just standing there in shock. You'd think based on my history that I would have retaliated, but frankly I was just too stunned to give any reaction at all. Then I was faced with the agonizing decision of whether or not to complain about him to the manager, but I decided to leave it alone. The kid probably had some issues going on and getting in trouble at work was another thing he didn't need. Jeez !! |
Ah man, that story reminds me of another classic Rude person story that
took place, you guessed it, at that very same store, my local "Stop and Be an
Idiot". Listen carefully because this one might be a little hard to
follow.
I'm waiting at the deli with #53. There's a 100 year old woman just to my
right who is #52, and #54 is a rude woman who is standing right next to me on my
left, sighing and mumbling "this is ridiculous" like so many women who are above
waiting in line do. The deli clerk is calling off numbers, and you
know how when people are not responding (those who have abandoned the agonizing
wait, or more likely in this area, those who have found a clever way to
illegally weasel ahead in line) the clerks start calling the numbers faster?
So, she gets to #53 and I respond, ordering my 1/2 a pound of ham. The
clerk pushes the button on the wall to change to lighted number sign to 53, and
starts to process my order when suddenly there's some confusion to my right.
Well, the 100 year old woman of course was clueless and missed out on when the
clerk called her number of 52. Now remember, the same clerk already
started working on my order, so she looks over at me as if to ask..."what should
I do ?" Of course, I tell her to go ahead and take care of the 100 year
old #52. Now, TRUST ME...the rude woman to my left (#54) knew EXACTLY what
was going on here. Now, another clerk finishes up with another customer,
sees that the light shows 53, and calls out "54". You guessed
it....this rude bitch yells right out, "oh right here, I'm 54", totally cutting
me out of the whole order of things since I decided to be nice to the clueless
#52 by donating my clerk to her. I was so mad...
We have 2 pet cockatiel birds. One of them, Raybert, is crazy. We actually think he has mental problems. If you saw some of the antics he pulls you'd probably agree. Most people think that birds just sit there and are basically useless pets, but again, if you spent a day with these birds you'd see how much fun they can be. We like to give them an hour or so of "free time" out of the cage to fly around and get some exercise each day. Plus that's of course when they get themselves into mischief and is what makes them fun pets. So check out what happened the other day. We have a stuffed bear thing in the dining room. It's a boy and girl, and ya know you squeeze its paw and it sings the song "I've Got You Babe". So I'm sitting at the computer and I know my wife is in the bathroom doing her make-up. Suddenly I hear "I've got you to hold my hand..." etc. My wife thought that I did it and couldn't understand why, but my suspicion was correct. Sure enough, there's Raybert sitting in front of the thing just-a bobbin' his yellow head up and down dancing to the music. He must have been biting at it and managed to bite its paw right where the switch is and set it off himself. I know it's probably one of those "you had to be there" things, but it was so funny I almost couldn't stand it. |
Well, I'm very sorry to see that Janet Jackson is making the rounds on all of the TV magazine and interview shows this week. Why do we have to see this whore again, just when this country was finally getting over the embarrassment she in-part caused us with the famous "wardrobe malfunction" episode. She's still maintaining that this was an accident, which means that she is a liar as well as an idiot, since it was obvious to the whole world that this was a planned, staged, rehearsed event. I like to watch a football game every once a while, but I'm glad I'm not a big NFL fan, because my thought right from the second I saw that shenanigan was ..."Take a Hike*, NFL". That they could have been ignorant enough to involve MTV and anyone or anything that is involved any way with the hip-hop world is nothing other than inexcusable. It's like having Andrew Dice Clay guest-host on Romper Room. And what's up with Justin Timberlake, who's just as guilty as JJ, NFL, and MTV ? This idiot appeared on TV one night when I was at work and one of my co-workers (CG) asked the question....Is this guy ever going to go away ? Very well said. Take a good look at all of this rap and hip-hop bullshit that is going here. Sometimes it's no wonder everyone else in the world hates us. |
* The "Take a Hike" idea was stolen from former KLOS Los Angeles radio Sportscaster Todd Donoho's show. Each day he would come up with some idiot in the sports world that did something stupid and finger him with the "Take a Hike" thing, which I always enjoyed.
Have I mentioned lately how rude some people are ? If you aren't starting to see my way after these stories, then you're probably as crazy as I am. Both of these things happened on the SAME DAY this week...
We have a stray cat in the neighborhood that my wife has become a foster parent to until we can find someone to adopt her. I put an ad on a website about the cat, and finally some woman in the area responded, saying how interested she was in adopting the cat. My wife calls her on the phone, and they agree to meet the next afternoon. That night we let the cat stay in the house, gave her treats, stuff like that, figuring it's the last time we'll see her (this cat is really nice and friendly). The next day my wife calls the woman, gets her answering machine, and leaves a message. You know where this is going....never heard back from the Bitch. Not a phone call, not a message, not an e-mail....NOT A F***ING THING !!! Take a Hike, "Harley Girl". |
I'm outside busting my ass on a project and have to go in the house for something and I hear the answering machine beeping. I check the message and it's some woman nearly hysterical, saying how she has an interview at 12:00 but cannot get there until around 12:30 because she's stuck at the DMV. (already I'm seeing what a genius she is, since she goes to DMV just before an important interview, I guess thinking that some miracle will occur and she will not get jammed up there). So, I do what I always do and give her a courtesy call . Let me ask you 2 questions...would you actually do this ?, and how many people do you know that would do this ? Unless you're my parents, whom are the nicest people in the Universe, and an uncanny New England anomaly, I'm saying that your answers are "no", and "none". So, I check the caller ID and there's 2 different numbers with the same last name. I call the 1st number and explain to the woman that "someone who has a job interview called to say that she would be late, but she dialed the wrong number and got my house instead, and that I'm just letting her know because it sounded important, and she probably needs to call back again at the right number". "Oh, that must have been my daughter", she replies, obviously irritated that I bothered her with this. After a short discussion about what occurred, the tramp hangs up without even a simple "thank you".
Now I'm debating whether or not to call the other number. Knowing that rudeness is an inherited trait which is passed on from generation to generation, I'm nearly certain that the daughter will be just as much of a rude bitch, but I decide to give her the benefit of the doubt. I call her and it's her cell phone. Needless to say it's a bad connection because those things simply do not work, yet for some reason that I will never understand, everyone thinks they have to have one. Anyhow, I explain to her the same deal, and she's basically interrogating me about why it was my number that appeared on her caller ID. In the end, all I got from her was the obligatory "OK thanks". Ya know what? I just spent my time, time which I don't have, performing a gesture of courtesy for this person that almost no one else in the world would do. I expect... no...I DEMAND a more appropriate response than "OK thanks". Like maybe "Gee it's so nice of you to call, I really appreciate it. That interview is real important to me", etc. But, I suppose I'm the idiot for expecting this around here. |
Anybody out there from the New Haven area ? If so, then you know probably more than anyone in the country (seriously) what a really good pizza should be. You can pretty much go anywhere and count on the pie being great. Yet up here in the great Hartford County (remember, it's "New England's Rising Star") you might as well just forget about it. I've lived in this area now for 10 years, and while it would certainly be a great exaggeration to say I've tried all the pizza places, after auditioning many in my town and in the surrounding towns, and always being disappointed, I figure it's time to give up. This fact was proven yet again a couple of weeks ago. We had a family event in Hamden, and decided to stay overnight in Wallingford, just to get out of the house for a change. So we leave the hotel and drive down I-91 a little ways. Of course the exit I decide to get off on is basically a disaster. All that really was there was a huge chemical plant. I couldn't even find a liquor store. Suddenly this little Italian restaurant appeared, basically in the middle of nowhere. Of course, the pizza was the best we've had in 10 years, not counting the last time I took a chance at a pizza in the New Haven area and found it to be awesome (that happened to be Modern Pizza, one of NH's most popular). So, I spend 10 years in the Hartford area trying every place I can think of with poor results, and the only 2 times I've tried a NH pizza since I lived in that area years ago, they were both incredible. Remember, Hartford is only maybe 35 miles from new Haven. Coincidence ? I think not. Pizza is just another one of the many things that suck up her in the State's Capital. I wish I could remember the name of the place in Wallingford so I could give 'em a plug. The waitress was really nice, and they even served Foxon Park beverages, which every good guinea like myself knows to be a New Haven classic. THE PLACE WAS CALLED "GRAND APIZZA NORTH", and it's actually in North Haven.
Speaking of pizza, here's the Mitch Amatrudo philosophy on pizza packaging. If the box is made of corrugated cardboard and says "Here's your fresh, hot pizza delivered to your door" on it, it's gonna suck. If, on the other hand it's in a thin box that you must hold from the bottom to prevent disaster, and actually has the name of the restaurant on it, there's at least a chance it's gonna be pretty good. If they're too frugal to buy their own boxes, they're skimping on their ingredients as well. |
I picked up a hitch-hiker this morning on the way to work. She was a 40-something Hispanic woman standing on the side of the road with a cane in one hand and her thumb up in the other. It's like 7 in the morning. I figure "what the heck". She puts her cane in the Jeep and struggles to hop up into the passenger seat. She goes every day to Hartford to some medical clinic for her messed up leg, but evidently the bus schedule does not work out for her on the weekends. She was all appreciative of me stopping for her, telling me how "even the Spanish people don't stop to pick me up", stuff like that. I took her as far as I could and she went on her way. it got me to thinking that you almost never see hitch-hikers anymore. I guess it's another one of those kinda cool things that's forever gone now. Too bad. Even when it was more popular 30 years ago it always had a stigma attached to it, like people who hitch-hiked were always troubled youths or something. I remember that I rarely had the guts to stick my thumb out, and the only time I would do it was if my car broke down or something like that. I usually would pick them up though, but as I said you never see them anymore. It's actually kind of an interesting human interaction thing. This stranger gets in your car, you have a brief but usually pleasant conversation for a few minutes, the walker is real psyched that he/she got picked up , and the driver gets to feel like he did his good deed for the day by helping someone out. Maybe this troubled world of ours could use more hitch-hikers. |
So, I'm at the dreaded Supermarket the other day. There's an 80 year old Yankee standing about 5 feet from the number-dispensing machine at the deli. As I approach, I'm watching him carefully because like most of the other people in the store, he's pretty much just standing there in everyone's way but not doing anything. Making a constant evaluation of my adversary as always, I have to decide whether I should go out of my way and go around him to proceed, or to walk between him and the number machine. I decide the latter, and of course just as I get to the machine he decides he needs a number. Out goes his wrinkled arm to snatch his number, right in front of me, causing me to stop like the gates were coming down at a railroad crossing. Not a word from him....nothing. It's not an "X Generation" thing or anything like that folks. New England rudeness is something that has been passed down from generation to generation. |
I saw 2 lesbians the other day and I got to thinking, what came first, the "look" or the lesbianism (is there such a word?). Now, I know that there are probably lesbians out there who look totally normal and feminine and stuff, whom we would have no idea of their sexual preference, but you know the type I mean here. You can always tell. But not only is it the "butchy" haircut and clothing, they just seem to have a "look" to them, even in their facial features and body type, etc. I have to wonder if having this look contributed to their becoming gay, or does being gay somehow cause the body to magically transform in this way? It's kind of interesting if you think about it. BTW I'm not bashing lesbians at all here. I really could give a rat's ass if someone wants to march to the beat of a different drummer in life. It's really not anyone's business anyhow. |
OK here we go. I finally have some data on an important issue. Are my wife and I the only people here who are not in total denial about how bad the weather is here? Does anyone else remember how much rain we got early this summer? Not only did it kill all of the new grass I planted, but it even managed to kill an artificial tree !! I kid you not. The leaves got so saturated with water that they all curled up when it finally dried out. It ABSOLUTELY blows my mind how the weather forecasters continue to try to sell us on the ridiculous notion that "we need the rain". Are you kidding me ? This is the Eastern United States, people ! It's a wet climate. DON'T WORRY...IT'S GOING TO RAIN !! After all the rain we got in spring / early summer, all it took was a stretch of 5 or 6 dry days to get everyone all nervous about the big drought. We get all of this rain and everything floods and the Governor calls a State of Emergency, and then it's sunny just enough to dry everything up and suddenly we need the rain again. Are you people who believe this really that stupid? For some reason that I will never figure out, we all have this belief that rain is a good thing. Now, I'm not that stupid. I know that everyone needs rain and water to survive, but c'mon guys, enough is enough ! How many events can you think of that have been ruined by rain? How many weddings, graduations, camping trips, family picnics ? Can you honestly tell me that bad weather is not your biggest worry when planning an important event here? Of course you can't. Can you even count how many home improvement projects have been ruined, cancelled, or hopelessly postponed because of rain? Of course you can't. You can't, because it rains ALL THE TIME here, but unbelievably we are still brainwashed into believing that we need it !! OK here comes the data that I promised...
3.4 million people live in Connecticut. We receive an average of 44" of rain per year. That's just shy of 1" of rain every week ! An inch is a pretty good amount of rain, yet we get it nearly every week. God forbid we go 2 or an incredibly rare 3 weeks without any ( I don't remember 3 weeks without rain in my lifetime, and I doubt seriously if we've had 2 dry weeks in a row in the last 10 years). Also, if we do happen to go for a stretch of a week or so without rain, you can rest assured that when we do get it, it's gonna be several inches in a couple of days, not just the 2 extra inches in a week that we need to 'catch up". Please.
Did you see on the news recently about all of the people in Los Angeles who are dropping dead in the streets from dehydration? Neither did I. That's most likely because it is not happening. Why is it not happening? Because the people of LA are getting enough water to survive. 10 million people live in Los Angeles. They receive an average of 16" of rain per year. So, let's see....an area that has nearly triple the amount of people than in CT gets less than half the rain that we do, and they are doing just fine.
Clark County (Las Vegas) Nevada only gets 9" of rain a year, and they have 1.6 million residents. Here again, half the population of CT is surviving on only 1/5 of the rain that we get here.
I lived in LA for 8 years, and believe me there is a LOT to say for almost NEVER having to worry about bad weather, but this is not to say that there are not big time water problems out West. They really do need rain out there, and it's a problem that "officials" are well aware of, but to look at these numbers then preach that we need more than our 44" of rain is clearly ludicrous.
What's happening here, in my opinion, is that we are using our "average"
and/or "expected" rainfall totals when determining when we "need" more rain, and
this is nothing other than just plain stupid. So, hypothetically, in
mid-July after 10 straight days of rain that has destroyed countless weddings,
plants, picnics and vacations, the meteorologists are still trying to make us
believe that "we need it". Why? Because we had an unusually rare and
tolerably dry spring, so we're only at 20" mid-year when we should be at 22 !!!
Oh my God, we need that other 2" to catch up !! Unbelievable.
It's just as stupid as saying that if we get an average of 8 hurricanes making
landfall in the US every year, that we are in a "deficit" (I love it when they
use that word) if we're only at 4 near the end of the season.
WAKE UP !!!!!!! THE WEATHER SUCKS HERE...PERIOD....NO MORE
EXCUSES...NO MORE DENIAL !!
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Finally !! The photos of baby Suri Cruise are being released !!
I don't think I could have waited even another day !!
IDIOTS !!!!!!!
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My hero of the week. Some un-named guy in New York got his ass kicked by rapper Busta Rhymes, after he allegedly spit on Rhymes' car ! I love this story. In true rap fashion, this Busta idiot has been immersed in violence, including one of his bodyguards being shot to death. Rhymes also was sued recently for allegedly assaulting a fan who asked for an autograph. Yea, these rap guys are a real piece of work, and if we don't work hard and fast to get this shit out of the mainstream we are going to continue to watch this country decline and degrade a little more each day. Kudos to the mystery man who had the balls to land a huge lunger on this idiot's Escalade |
Not everything I write has to be cynical and dark, so I'll throw this one out there, even though it's one of those where you really "had to be there". We just got back from a cruise. You always hear about the insane amounts of food that you get on these things and it's true. Anyhow I happened to be walking in the "restaurant" and as I was approaching the dessert selections, I noticed a cute little Asian girl, probably 8 years old or so, looking over all of the stuff. She finally decided on this big slice of chocolate cake, and just as she was walking away with it I was right in front of her. She looked up at me with her eyes wide open and this big, shit-eating grin on her face, all excited about this delicious treat that she was about to devour, obviously in awe that it's all free and she can have as much as she wants ! I wish I could have gotten a picture of it. I love to see a happy child. |
We had a call this morning for an elderly man who was unconscious.
Turns out he was dead. Often when you tell people you're a Firefighter
they get visions of you dashing in and out of burning buildings with a child in
each arm, or they wonder about the horrors of seeing burned bodies or gruesome
car accidents, and most people feel that this is the stressful part of the job.
Yes it is, and even the most battle-hardened Firefighter can eventually suffer
from the effects of this stress. These kinds of incidents are seldom,
however. Something like this morning's incident is commonplace for most of
us though. We get there and the poor guy is obviously dead. His wife
is upset but still thinks he had a stroke or something and will be fine, so we
have to give her the bad news and of course she freaks. Soon her son
arrives, walks in the door visibly shaken, but we can tell he still thinks this
is not a very serious situation. His Mom immediately tells him "He's
gone". "Oh shit, no !" he says and immediately breaks down. Within
minutes the daughter arrives and a similar situation ensues. Now
everyone's crying and hysterical. The son is calling the Grandchildren on
the phone at 6am and it's obvious from what he is saying to them that they are
devastated as well by the news. It's a very sad situation but we
have to do our best to be professional, even though all of us are thinking what
it would be like if this same thing happened to us 1st thing in the morning,
having to call our sons and daughters to tell them that "Papa died". We
have no training in grief counseling like a Hospital social worker would, yet we
have to do our best to comfort the families by choosing what to say and what not
to say to them, and most of the time the people will remember our kindness.
This is the stuff that can get to us in time.
People please remember, just because you don't see flames shooting through the
roof of a building in your town every evening on the 6:00 news, doesn't mean
we're not out there doing what needs to be done every day.
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Steve Irwin, the famous "Crocodile Hunter" finally got himself killed. It's weird how things work sometimes. This guy's been doing stupid stuff to alligators, snakes, and all kinds of dangerous animals forever, and he meets his demise with a stingray. Too bad, he seemed like a pretty cool guy, wicked popular in Australia, and I'm sure there's a lot of children really upset about it. RIP Steve. |
I'm annoyed with drive-up windows. Now, some of them have been around
for years, like the fast food joints and places like that, but I still try to
avoid using them. Something about it just screams "Lazy Ass" to me.
Sometimes it's convenient, especially if you have kids in the car (God help you)
or something like that, but for the most part I'll try to go into the
restaurant. Usually it works out much better for me. I don't
have to deal with the stress of that feeling like I have to make a quick
decision while stopped beside the big menu, and plus I'm always stressed about
not being able to understand what the clerk is saying. Those speakers were
hard enough to understand even back in the day when Americans spoke English.
I always get a kick out of going inside, getting my fries, getting back in the
car and leaving, while there's a line of 8 lazy idiots waiting at the
drive-thru. Where it sometimes backfires on me though, is when the
employees are prioritizing the orders for the drive-thru slugs and laying the
walk-in customers under the bus, which does happen sometimes. This pisses
me off.
Some of the drive-thru stuff is getting crazy though, like the drive-up cleaners
and the drive-up pharmacy. It seems we're creating a society of laziness
with all of this. There's a Dunkin Donuts in town, and of course they have
a drive-up window. To be honest, this kind of makes sense to me when
you consider the whole "in a hurry, on the way to work" thing, but this 1
particular DD is a popular hang-out for folks. There's old-timers there, bikers,
classic car guys, teenagers, etc. It's kind of like going back in time a
bit and I like it. I think more people should get up off the Corinthian
leather and go inside !
Final note on drive-ups. I remember years ago I think it was in Rhode
Island, they actually had drive-up windows at liquor stores, which if you think
about it is really funny !!!
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I have to actually give my wife the credit for noticing this, but the thing about people around here is that everyone feels that they have to be "first". Everyone's got to be sure to get out in front of the other guy all the time. Whether it's on the road or in a checkout line or anywhere there are other people around, everybody's always gotta be first. Ever since she said this I've been really getting a kick out of noticing it. Watch how many times some idiot will pull right out in front of you on the road, even though there's not another car behind you for 6 miles, or or even if he decides to subsequently drive at an agonizingly slow pace. Watch how many times you see idiots pull incredibly stupid moves to get around you, only to turn off 100 feet down the road anyway. "Gotta get in front of that guy just in case he decides to pull into the McDonalds too. God forbid he gets in line before me and gets the last Big Mac". F***ing unbelievable. |
Just got back from the "Dollar Store". Now I know it's not Macys, but I still expect even a little bit of common courtesy, even here in the capital of rudeness. Anyhow to start with, I'm the next person to get checked out. Suddenly this woman comes out of nowhere and cuts right in front of me. She already had an item at the counter but must have forgot something, so I guess this gave her a license to still be next in line. So she's going on and on about how she has this $2.00 off deal and giving the cashier instructions on how to enter it into the register and stuff like that. "I'm gonna get my $2.00 off, I'm gonna make sure of it"....stuff like that. So the cashier completes her order of 2 ITEMS and guess what? "Oh I'm gonna have to go outside and get some more money". So now the whole line is held up while this idiot goes outside to the car to see her friend for more money. Then, and this is a classic move that I intended to write about anyhow, the idiot behind me pulls the classic New England "next in line shuffle". If you live here you know of it. it's when another register opens up and the cashier says "I'll take the next person in line". Suddenly it's Talledaga time, with everyone scrambling and cutting each other off in the race to be that lucky "next person in line". I've never actually gone off on anyone for doing this, because it's so prevalent here that I would be screaming at every store I go to every time, but every time it happens I stand there just burning up inside, thinking of badly I'd like to just bombard him or her with insults. AAARRRGGHH !! |
I was watching the news last night and the classic "bandit caught on surveillance video" came on. Are you kidding me ? With all of today's technology I cannot believe that the quality of these cameras can be that bad. We can cram a decent color camera into our cell phones (hey, ya can't make or receive calls on them so they might as well be good for something, right?) but apparently a wall-mounted camera that actually takes clear pictures cannot be done. |
I'm really not a bad guy. Actually I do a lot of nice little things for people very often. I always try to be polite to people and I'll often do things like take a person's shopping cart back for them after they're done loading their car, or stop to help disabled motorists, check on my elderly neighbors, stuff like that. I never mention these acts to anyone because I don't do it for "credit", I do it because it makes me feel good. I do have an evil side to me though. It's funny because my wife is always telling me about how my parents think I'm such the perfect gentleman all the time, and how "if they only knew how evil you really are". It's just that if I get rubbed just the wrong way I will react, while others will just let it fester.
Speaking of rude women, I was at the Supermarket earlier this summer and something happened worth mentioning. By the way, our local supermarket is called "Stop and Shop", but if you asked me they should have named it "Stop and Be an Idiot" because the stupidity that people display in these things is amazing, and I'm sure you find many writings of "retail incidents" in this blog. So, I'm behind this woman in the checkout line and believe it or not I'm pissed off and in a hurry. She's yakking away on her cell phone while the cashier is doing her order. I'm annoyed with her already. She finished up her order, then leaves without paying ! She was too wrapped up in her conversation to know what was going on. Now the cashier had to lock up her drawer and chase the woman into the parking lot to find her. She comes back in, still on the phone and is fumbling through her purse looking for money. That's it...I finally snapped and yelled out to her "Get off the phone and pay attention to what you're doing". She replied with a quick..."Oh you shut up"...to which I immediately responded with a vulgar remark that cannot be printed in this blog. Everyone stood there with their mouths wide open, she turned red as a beet and stormed off. Idiot !! |
I finally have proof of how snooty and bitchy women from Connecticut are. Now, I know this is certainly going to piss off every woman in the state, but I also know that EVERY Connecticut guy who reads this, at least those who are roughly my age, will absolutely agree with me, though I doubt anyone will step-up and admit it. We know from when we were younger how hard-to-get they always were. if you weren't a jock or rich they didn't give a guy the time of day, stuff like that. So many CT women just have this total holier-than-thou thing going on. For example, for a guy who's so angry about so many things, I still always do my best to be polite to people, and I still have some rare old-fashioned ways, which include holding the door open and allowing a woman to "go first". For every 10 times that I do this, I would say that 6 women respond with half-hearted, lame gesture of thanks. 2 will be genuinely gracious and friendly about it, but unbelievably the other 2 will do NOTHING !! Not a smile, not a thanks, NOTHING ! This absolutely blows my mind.
Now, on to the proof that I mentioned. We got a Jeep Wrangler this summer. Jeep folks after all these years still have this thing where we wave to each other or display a peace sign. I think that this is very cool, and it's also one of those things that you would think would have disappeared long ago. Anyhow, I'm here to tell you that not one time, NOT ONCE.....has a girl or a woman in a Wrangler returned the wave. NOT ONE TIME !!!! This is a perfect, classic example of how bitchy CT women are. |
It's August 2, 2006 and it's supposed to be over 100 degrees. Everyone is panicked and calling it a "heat wave". Yea I know it's hard for some people but relax folks ! There's never been a summer when we didn't have a week or so in the high 90's. Towns in the state are all setting up shelters and stuff and banners are coming across the TV screen with warnings. In a day or 2 it'll all be over. I think we've all got bigger things to worry about than a couple of hot days. |
Do not EVER use the term "Rap Music" around me. Rap is shit. Rap is talentless. Rap is ruining our society. Rap is an embarrassment to our country. Rap is sampling and plagiarism, Rap is NOT music. DO NOT insult me by calling it that. Thank you. |
I saw a bumper sticker yesterday that I loved. It had a picture of a staff on it and below it, it said "If you can read this, thank a music teacher". |
If you're going to get so pissed off every time your cell phone rings, why do you have it with you at all times ? Idiot !! |
Life guideline #37. ATM's are designed to be used by 1 person. If you're in line at the ATM and the person in front of you is actually 2 (or more) people all trying to figure how to operate it, MOVE ON !! Write a check, use your credit card, or do without. You will be there all day waiting for cash. |
It pisses me off that all of the ice cream vendors are foreigners now, and what's up with their trucks ? Remember the cool old open-cab Good Humor trucks with the row of chrome plated manually operated bells ? or the "Mister Softee" vans with all those louvered vents on them ? Now we get a piece of shit old Dodge Van that someone cut an opening out of the side of with a sawzall and installed a Kenmore freezer in it. And how about those annoying electronic music and voice things that they have playing over and over now ? How can these guys not be driven to Jihad after listening to that over and over again all day ? |
I was at the Home Depot the other day, carrying a 60 pound bag of concrete because I didn't want to try to weave one of those huge flat carts all around a bunch of idiots blocking all the aisles because they can't decide what they want. Anyhow, there's nobody in the checkout line, and as I'm approaching it , I am met at the same time by a guy with a bunch of stuff. in true Connecticut resident fashion, he made sure that he dashed right in front of me to be sure he got in line first while I was literally left holding the bag. I was so pissed. he was wearing a Red Sox cap so even though I'm somewhat of a Bosox fan, I routed for the Yankees for the next 72 hours. |
"Double Pushers" annoy the heck out of me. We had a medical call the other day at a hotel, and an employee pushed the "down" elevator button. Of course when the elevator didn't arrive right away he pushed the lighted button again, somehow thinking that this would increase the speed of the elevator cables. Idiot !! |
People with 1 or 3 names annoy me. (Sting, Prince, Courtney Thorne Smith, David Hyde Peirce, etc) |
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